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January New Releases
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2nd
The Killing of John Lennon

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Follows Mark Chapman as he plans and carries out his assassination of John Lennon.

 

4th
One Missed Call Movie

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

A remake of the popular J-Horror movie about people getting cell phone calls from their future selves just seconds before they die. They must find a way to stop their deaths from happening.

 

11th
First Sunday

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Ice Cube, Tracy Morgan and Katt Williams - good cast right? What about the story? They have to steal $13k from a church or else Ice Cube will lose his son. Well, 1 out of 2 ain’t bad.

 
In the Name of the King
The Pirate who dont do anything

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

No mystery here. If you like Veggie Tales and don’t mind Larry the Cucumber as the Jack Sparrow pirate captain, then you should be fine.

 

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

The main character’s name is Farmer. Guess what he does? Well, his wife is killed by who? The Krugs. Yes, that’s what they’re called. And he must seek, blah blah, you get the picture.

 

18th
Cassandras Dream
Mad Money movie

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Woody Allen directs another movie with no laughs, this time intentionally. Something about two brothers with problems meeting a girl that doesn’t help their situation.

 
One Eighteen O Eight

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Diane Keaton, Katie Holmes and Queen Latifah are three employees of the Federal Reserve that plan to steal money that’s about to be destoryed. It’s like First Wives Club meets The Italian Job.

 
Taxi to the Dark Side
Twenty Seven Dresses Movie

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

The pregnant hottie from Knocked Up plays a woman who has been a bridesmaid 27 times! And fights to avoid her 28th as her sister plans to marry the man she loves! Talk about suspending disbelief.

 

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Not written or directed by J.J. Abrams, just produced. Tells the story of a monster attack on New York through the video camera eyes of various people throughout the city.

 

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

A documentary about an Afghani taxi driver who was apprehended, tortured and ultimately killed at Bagram Air Base. It explores how this could happen in America.

 

25th
How She Move

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Kind of like Step Up and Bring it on. This is about a girl who uses her dancing talent to come of age by proving the naysayers wrong and following her heart and falling in love and making her dreams come true.

 
Meet the Spartans
Rambo movie

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

John Rambo is back, this time not really fighting for anything too exciting or important. Just a standard story about a guy who knows how to kill trying to save some missionaries.

 
Trailer Park Boys The Movie
untraceable movie

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Kind of like Silence of the Lambs if Buffalo Bill was a computer geek. An FBI agent, Diane Lane, hunts a serial killer who posts images of his victims on the internet. Wasn’t that on Law and Order like 100 times already?

 

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

Because Saturday Night Live, Jay Leno, David Letterman, Conan O’Brien, Mad TV, The Daily Show and Access Hollywood aren’t doing a good enough job spoofing pop culture, we need 90 minutes of cliche jokes.

 

WHAT IT’S ABOUT

These guys are big in Canada. Imagine Reno 911 set in a trailer park. They have some wacky scheme about robbing something but being idiots things don’t go according to plan.

 
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